5 Things To Do Before Saying I Do
One of the biggest decisions that anyone can make in their life is to get married. It seems a little strange, especially for those who are not in the age of thinking about this yet. Most of the time, we see marriages on the internet and TV as a means or a solution to a problem. Also, it is a big event, and everyone is either happy or drunk or even both. However, there are many truths that this presentation is leaving out of the picture, and you will realize that it is so different in real life.
People always jump into the marriage train without knowing what is going to happen next. As we have said before, it is always thought of as a solution or a hasty decision that is often framed as a romantic gesture. Sometimes, it is the last resort, especially if a bun is already inside the oven and everyone is just waiting for the bun to get out. Getting married is a decision that you should think about not just twice, but many times until you are sure.
Heavy Decision Making
It seems that it is something that no one wants to think about, though, especially if a lot of emotions are involved. However, it is still crucial to think about your current life and your readiness to move on to the next. If you think that married life is easy, take a look at your parent's relationship when you were children versus now. Is it still the same, and have you noticed any issues while you were growing up? Once you enter into marriage, you would probably experience most of what they did before.
There are so many things that you must consider before saying the last two words at the ceremony. We are not insinuating that married life is a prison cell, contrary to what you see in the media again. However, it is a different kind of responsibility since you will be tied to another person. You will still be two different people, but you will function as together in the eyes of the law. Before you enter into this agreement with your beloved or not, below are some things that you may want to do.
Some Words Of Wisdom
1. Enjoy The Single Life
It might seem so hypocritical, especially if you already have a partner waiting for you. However, there is a huge difference between being in a relationship versus tying the knot. Both of them have similar responsibilities, including companionship and camaraderie with each other. However, marriage concentrates on that bond that forms something more than just emotions. In the eyes of the government, it is now a different entity, but for the rest, it is a union of two people.
However, even if you are in a relationship, you are technically single. The bond that you have with that other person is supposed to be serious, but it is not binding yet. A disclaimer: this is not your way out to cheat with someone else. It is supposed to be time with yourself and thinking about what you want in life. Once you already have a family, everything already revolves around them, and you would not have the freedom that you have now.
If you are not in a relationship yet, then it is even better for you. You will have more time to think about whether marriage is for you or not. It is not for everybody, even if the world will tell you otherwise. Do not force yourself into a situation that you know you will not enjoy in the first place. However, there are advantages to living with a partner than alone at all, but it is up to you to work them around.
2. Prepare Your Finances
It is also important to be stable before going over the hedge with your partner. There are so many definitions of being financially stable, though, so it depends on you on what that means. For example, some people believe that having your house and a stable job is already a good indication of a marriage. Others like to build their wealth properly first before going on to any kind of relationship. Some even push it further until they reach the upper echelons of society, then they get married.
The importance of financial stability seems to be the push these days when it comes to finding a partner. It is not enough that you are both physically attracted to each other since a one night stand can handle it. For a relationship to flourish, both parties should have the ability to live with or without each other. Once their finances are combined, it makes it easier to start a family and have kids.
Many researchers often cite this new era as unstable for the economy. We have been struck by numerous catastrophes, then COVID-19 happened and pushed the world into lockdown. As you can see, it is crucial to have a job and a house that you can live comfortably with your family. Fortunately, the youth is focusing on it as well before committing to any kind of relationship with another person.
4. People And Plans Change Over Time
It is important to remember that things change while you are planning the previous entries to this list. We cannot anticipate what will happen with the world, but we can always prepare for ourselves. As a human being, it is essential to understand, though, that there are just some things out of our control. Once we have identified the ones we can control, then we can get our life on track.
Your finances and lifestyle are some elements of your life that you can control. Sometimes, it is necessary to change some of our habits to work with the relationship. In an ideal situation, both of you are already giving the best out of one another, and it works well. However, some situations may indicate that the relationship might not last.
For example, your current partner has already agreed to marry you. However, they changed their minds in the middle of the preparation and broke the engagement off. You would be a lucky person if they even explain why they are separating from you. Most of the time, you would not even have an answer, and you will be left behind without an explanation. It is not easy to move on or adapt to change, but it is necessary for your development and survival.
5. Learn To Live With Your Future Partner
If given a chance, it would be best to live with your partner first before tying yourselves together. It is not something that most people agree upon, especially those who have a religious background. However, cohabitation has already become a more popular option for couples versus getting married immediately. It has led to trends that pointed out the decrease of people marrying at a certain age.
Several factors make it work, starting with the experience with each other. If you have been a couple for a long time, you might think that you already know everything about the person that you will marry. After all, you have been dating all around town, and you seem to be compatible together. However, you will see the difference once you are living together inside one house. You will be spending more time with each other, almost a 24-hour interaction compared to a short date.
In this process, you will discover some of your future spouse’s quirks and habits. Sometimes, this experience strengthens the relationship as you already know how to live with each other. On the other hand, it can also be an eye-opener to those who might have discovered something that they did not like. In either case, it is still positive on your side since you will have the knowledge to back up your decision.
6. Set Your Priorities Straight
Lastly, it is crucial to set your priorities even while you are still single. Some people think that they can get their life on track once they get married. It has something to do with having familial responsibilities and being forced to be resourceful to help them survive. However, it is not an ideal situation since you will feel forced, and most people in this situation quit once everything becomes too stressful.
Once you have a family, your priorities have to change to accommodate the other members. Always remember that you are not living alone or with your parents anymore. Now, you are the head of the household, and you will have more responsibilities once you have a child. If you cannot prioritize your children, then why did you start a family in the first place?
It is essential to take care of yourself while you are still single. There are also some indulgences that you might want to explore while you are not tied with a ring. However, once you are tied, you need to change many things about yourself, so you need to be ready for it. If you want to get married earlier, then you must plan. Otherwise, you can always live your life the way you want it.